User Profile

"Maury, I am out of control. Yeah, I use drugs. I can do what I want, biatch! Yeah, I have sex, and I don't use protection! It's my hot body; I'll do what I want! I don't go to school and I kill people! What-evah! I'll do what I want!"




You look at me and see the girl
Who lives inside the golden world
But don't believe
That's all there is to see
You'll never know the real me

She smiles through a thousand tears
And harbors adolescent fears
She dreams of all
That she can never be
She wades in insecurity
And hides herself inside of me

Don't say she takes it all for granted
I'm well aware of all I have
Don't think that I am disenchanted
Please understand

It seems as though I've always been
Somebody outside looking in
Well here I am for all of them to bleed
But they can't take my heart from me
And they can't bring me to my knees
They'll never know the real me




HI MOM!!!!


Woman: What are you writing?
Writer: A novel.
Woman: What's the story?
Writer: There's no story. It's just people, gestures, moments, bits of rapture, fleeting emotions. In short, the greatest stories ever told.
Woman: Are you in the story?
Writer: I don't think so. But then, I'm kind of reading it, then writing it.


Yeah...most of this journal's private now. Cuz I'm turning it into a book, and eventually a movie. That means YOU are missing out, haha!...buymybook

:) JOIN THE HOLY ORGY KARMA SUTRA, EVERYONE! :)


You think you know...but you have no idea.

This is the Diary of Chinye.


The only things I HAVE to do in life are stay Black and die.



The official toxicity limit for humans is between one and one and a half grams of cocaine depending on body weight. I was averaging five grams a day, maybe more. I snorted ten grams in ten minutes once. I guess I had a high tolerance...

I love taking those online surveys that my friends email me. In freshman year the unlucky people on my mailing list would have their boxes filled weekly with my surveys. They would complain that I kept sending them the same thing over and over; I was the same person so of course my surveys would be the same!

I recently found a survey that I filled out in 9th grade. I had to laugh because so many things actually hadn’t changed since then! My favorite color, animal, food, everything was the same. There’s one question that I always loved: “What song do you think best describes you?” My answer is still the same; Mariah Carey’s Looking In.
This song talks about a girl who, on the outside, seems like a genuinely happy person who has everything she wants. On the inside, however, she feels as if she is alone in the world, as if no one understands her, as if she is on the outside looking in.

This song couldn’t describe me better. My personality depends on who I’m around. If you ask my friends to describe me they would probably call me loud, funny, gregarious, and weird. These characteristics would baffle people who don’t know me as well as my friends know me. Those people would probably call me quiet, shy, proper, and mysterious. Funny thing is, I’m all of these.

I’m an only child but I have lots of cousins on both side of my family. My mother is from Guyana, South America and my father is from Nigeria, Africa.

My hatred towards my dad has made me very prejudice towards Africans. My father is physically and mentally abusive and has an alcohol problem. I blame him for every issue I have, most importantly my love of drugs and my love of sex. I seriously think that when I die it will somehow be my father's fault.
Kinda like Jenny in Forrest Gump, if you know what I mean? (If you're a die-hard Gump fan like I am, you know what I mean)


At the end of eighth grade I decided that I didn't want anymore boyfriends, because I didn't think it was fair for me to get in a relationship with someone and have them deal with all of my problems that I can't even deal with myself. When I was 5 years old I was raped by a baby-sitter's son. I'm sure that subconciously this has had an affect on how I deal with relationships now. I tend to start hating people after I find out that they are intersted in me and in 9th grade I started hooking up with all of my fuck-buddies. The greatest creation of all time, fuck-buddies are a great way for me to be in relationships without having to actually be in relationships. I never talk to them unless I need to, and I'm perfectly fine with that.

I first attempted suicide in the 7th grade. I never had enough balls to actually hurt myself so all of my suicide attempts have been of the pill-popping kind. I do think that I am slowly trying to kill myself with all of the stuff that I do, it's just that it's not as obvious this way.

Growing up I became accustomed to both of my parents' cultures — food, clothes, music. I was raised by “the village”. However, I was very shy when I was growing up. Even now I tend to be very reserved. I’d rather be home, alone, than have to deal with people. Except, of course, for all of my friends. I love my friends more than anything in the world. I’m a totally different person when I’m with them—I’m happy and spontaneous and it’s fun.

My first exposure to the stage was at Peoples Church. I was “Stormy Weathers” in a Sunday School play. This lead to several roles in elementary school and now I’m hooked…forever.
In freshman year of high school I was still in the beginning stages of Chinye. I had decided that I didn’t care what people thought of me and I was just going to have fun. That’s what made my high school years great. I became involved in my school’s Drama Department almost instantly. I was an active member of my POM squad and had spent some time on a song writing project my school was experimenting with. My love of school activities continued and I found I was spending more time at school than at home. I was an active member of numerous clubs and activities and spent whatever remaining time I had at my dance studio.

Music. What would I do without it? No matter what mood I’m in, music always brings me peace. It doesn’t even have to be peaceful. I’ve been known to occasionally blast rap music from my speakers to calm me down. Ever since ninth grade I have been a lover of rock music and musicals (an odd combination). I have always, always loved my oldies. Sometimes when I get tired of my hit music stations my dial turns to oldies. What an inappropriate name, "oldies". I can never get tired of them.

I think it’s great that I have such an eclectic taste in music. I don’t know how that’s going to help me achieve anything in life but it’s still fun. I knew that I had a music problem back when I was 6 and started taking piano lessons. I didn’t think it was possible to find a beat to dance to in Bach’s music. I’ve since quit playing the piano; I found out I like performing to music much more than I like playing it. I’ve been dancing since I was three, if you can call that dancing. Senior year was the first year that I wasn't on my school's pom squad. If I had been on the squad I would have been the only member to have been on it all four years. I hadn't expected a life in which I wasn't a pom.

In the beginning of high school I decided not to live up to the normal high school stereotypes. That’s one thing about me, I don’t like doing what people expect. I don’t like following the crowd. I remember there was a boy in 9th grade who every girl swooned over. I hated him. I didn’t even know him and I hated him. The fact that every girl in my class liked him made me dislike him. I tend to stray away from the “in” things. I don’t know, maybe I just like being different?

I am a Theatre major and Journalism minor at Howard Univeristy, class of 2006. My goal is to be a broadcast journalist by day, (t.v. or radio I'm not sure yet, maybe both) write for a newpaper by afternoon, and a stage actress by night. Haha, let's see how that turns out, shall we?

My life is anything but the expected. I’m the pompon in the sea of pocket protectors. I’m the bellbottoms in the sea of Parasucos. I’m the lip-gloss in the sea of blush, eyeliner, mascara, and plucked eyebrows. I’m the black nail polish in the sea of French manicures. I’m the blue Nautica sweater in the sea of black trench coats. I’m what’s not expected and that’s what makes it fun.

During my senior year of high school I was voted class clown, was senior class president, was associate editor of the paper, was an anchor on the morning announcements and was one of the biggest potheads in the school.




R.I.P Coco
December 1994 - June 2006


AND we just got an addition to the family, Mocha.


thats Mocha


6 tattoos, 9 piercings. Will there be any more? Only time will tell...

Enjoy the show!



Pit bulls = love

Don't blame the breed because of the people. Spread knowledge, not ignorance.
Made by post_itnote



"I used to do drugs. I still do, but I used to, too."


Obviously, my drug use is exaggerated or I would be long sice dead. I've already outlived the most brutal abuser of our time—Neal Cassady. Me and William Burroughs are the only other ones left. We're the last unrepentant public dope fiends, and he's seventy years old and claiming to be clean. But he hasn't turned on drugs, like that lying, treacherous, sold-out punk Timothy Leary.
RIP HUNTER S THOMPSON

We had two bags of grass, seventy-five pellets of mescaline, five sheets of high-powered blotter acid, a salt shaker half-full of cocaine and a whole galaxy of multicolored uppers, downers, screamers, laughers ... Also a quart of tequila, a quart of rum, a case of Budweiser, a pint of raw ether, and two dozen amyls ... not that we needed all that for the trip, but once you get locked in a serious drug collection, the tendency is to push it as far as you can ...

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